So I've been feeling a little strange in the past few hours, and i couldn't really figure a way to address these feelings, then i thought, "Oh wait!" And now i'm here.
Basically, i'm feeling very undecided and scared for the future. Sophomore year's almost over. Next year i'll be a Junior, taking all AP and Honors (except for math) courses and then...Senior year. Now while i was taking a shower and listening to Temper Trap's 'Down River' i realized that while i thought i had an idea of what i wanted to do with my life i honestly don't have a clue anymore.
I had been toying with the idea of getting something in psychiatry, and maybe becoming a therapist, but today it hit me that i honestly have no idea what i want to do with the rest of my life.
But.
It's ok.
And i'm NOT going to be a hypocrite. Because people have come to me stressed about this stuff and i always tell 'em: "Don't stress, you've got plenty of time to decide"
And i'm going to listen to myself. Because i do have plenty of time to decide, and in a few months i could be feeling completely different.
All that matters is the present. And i'll be damned if i let the distant future affect me now.
Temper Trap- Down River
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2DluY5xnPo
'Think about it'
Peace
~Sam
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Who will save your soul?
Jewel- 'Who Will Save Your Soul'
"Who will save your soul when it comes to the flower?
Who will save your soul after all the lies that you told, boy!
Who will save your soul if you won't save your own?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rG602tjDzGs
Great song.
And. I hate Spring right now.
It's 10AM, i should be in school, but due to allergy's and sickness, i'm not. So instead i'd figure i'd write a nice long blog post to pass the time. Problem is, i can't think of anything to write about, so i suppose i'll restart Jewel and let myself just...type.
So, here we go!
Here's a topic:
Self image!
For most people, kids/teens/adults, self image can be a pretty slippery slope. There's a fine line between appreciating who you are and being a conceited ***hole, and i think that it's very hard to find and navigate along that line.
It sure was for me!
Cause i'm not gonna lie, this year has been the first year that i'm truly comfortable and at ease with my body, and the first year i can remember in awhile where i'm completely comfortable taking my shirt off.
Secondly this post is not geared at anyone specifically! I can name a few people who don't quite realize how attractive/handsome/whatever they are! And these are my friends! Guys and girls! And i totally understand that, cause i know from experience what it feels like to not be entirely comfortable with yourself.
Moving on to the next song!
Third Eye Blind- 'Bonfire'
"Lightning comes and lightning goes
And it's all the same to me
Let it in
Cuz I want you so
I can hardly breathe or release
Into one thousand pieces
I have broke into
Over you
The chain will soon be gone,
I keep burning on and on and on"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzSEC756PUE
I really like this song. 'Cause i wear a chain...for reasons of my own, and i love the lyric:
'Into one thousand pieces, I have broke into, Over you, The chain will soon be gone, I keep burning on and on and on'.
Good stuff!
OH BOY!
Spring Break is in two days.
I am...soooooo super excited! 'Cause i've got a pretty amazing Spring Break planned out! I'm not going anywhere...but...it should be really, really nice.
And! We finally have a band name! (I'll explain that whole topic in another post at a later date) But!
'Parade Candy'
I like it. A lot.
And! We're definitely an 'Alternative' rock band, and i love it!! On one song i've got a wah pedal and reverb, and on another i'm going balls-out on a Tele and overdrive. I love it! And. I'm suitable excited for our first gig, which should be in a few weeks.
So, i think i've wasted your time enough with this rambling, long post. But, y'know? That's OK. And really, try and learn to wake up in the morning, go to the mirror, and say "This is me. These are my flaws. Cool" Cause that's all anyone can do! And! Stay happy! Cause i guarantee that someone out there loves you, be that friends, family, or me! So chin up! And stay happy!
Now if you'll excuse me, i'm going to sit in my basement and play Call Of Duty. And wish that Friday will hurry itself up.
Peace
~Sam
"Who will save your soul when it comes to the flower?
Who will save your soul after all the lies that you told, boy!
Who will save your soul if you won't save your own?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rG602tjDzGs
Great song.
And. I hate Spring right now.
It's 10AM, i should be in school, but due to allergy's and sickness, i'm not. So instead i'd figure i'd write a nice long blog post to pass the time. Problem is, i can't think of anything to write about, so i suppose i'll restart Jewel and let myself just...type.
So, here we go!
Here's a topic:
Self image!
For most people, kids/teens/adults, self image can be a pretty slippery slope. There's a fine line between appreciating who you are and being a conceited ***hole, and i think that it's very hard to find and navigate along that line.
It sure was for me!
Cause i'm not gonna lie, this year has been the first year that i'm truly comfortable and at ease with my body, and the first year i can remember in awhile where i'm completely comfortable taking my shirt off.
Secondly this post is not geared at anyone specifically! I can name a few people who don't quite realize how attractive/handsome/whatever they are! And these are my friends! Guys and girls! And i totally understand that, cause i know from experience what it feels like to not be entirely comfortable with yourself.
Moving on to the next song!
Third Eye Blind- 'Bonfire'
"Lightning comes and lightning goes
And it's all the same to me
Let it in
Cuz I want you so
I can hardly breathe or release
Into one thousand pieces
I have broke into
Over you
The chain will soon be gone,
I keep burning on and on and on"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzSEC756PUE
I really like this song. 'Cause i wear a chain...for reasons of my own, and i love the lyric:
'Into one thousand pieces, I have broke into, Over you, The chain will soon be gone, I keep burning on and on and on'.
Good stuff!
OH BOY!
Spring Break is in two days.
I am...soooooo super excited! 'Cause i've got a pretty amazing Spring Break planned out! I'm not going anywhere...but...it should be really, really nice.
And! We finally have a band name! (I'll explain that whole topic in another post at a later date) But!
'Parade Candy'
I like it. A lot.
And! We're definitely an 'Alternative' rock band, and i love it!! On one song i've got a wah pedal and reverb, and on another i'm going balls-out on a Tele and overdrive. I love it! And. I'm suitable excited for our first gig, which should be in a few weeks.
So, i think i've wasted your time enough with this rambling, long post. But, y'know? That's OK. And really, try and learn to wake up in the morning, go to the mirror, and say "This is me. These are my flaws. Cool" Cause that's all anyone can do! And! Stay happy! Cause i guarantee that someone out there loves you, be that friends, family, or me! So chin up! And stay happy!
Now if you'll excuse me, i'm going to sit in my basement and play Call Of Duty. And wish that Friday will hurry itself up.
Peace
~Sam
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Back in the day...
So today, in my 5 minutes of free time i realized i still have my old box of Legos under my bed.For you young whippersnappers with your doo-dads and gizmos, Legos were colored blocks that stuck together to make fantastic things.
Anyhoo, this got me thinking. I'll be 16 in July, and it was only 6 years ago that i was running around my yard with my buddies, pretending that our sticks were swords and playing with Legos up in my room. 6 years ago.
6 years.
I don't know why this all hit me today...but in 6 years i'll be 21, in about 2 years i'll legally be an adult. Woah.
In 2 years i'll be off at college.
Woah.
Hell, i've still got some old Nerf guns in my closet.
Remember those?
Jesus. I'm growing up.
Woah.
But i'm not complaining! Because this are different now, but not necessarily any worse. True, things are a helluva lot more complicated now, and there are some pretty low Lows. But there's also some pretty high Highs.
"Only a teenage Wasteland"
Moving on, kids are incredibly busy these days. Take my day for example. I was up until 12:30am studying for my Government class, woke up at 6, went to school, came home, got a haircut, went to see my girlfriend, came back home, practiced guitar, ate dinner, went out to the store to buy clothes, and now i'm here. Good day.
However! Back in the '50s all kids needed to worry about was going blind from too much 'happy hands'. Christianity. Morals. Wonderbread. Mayonnaise. Jello. Good stuff like that.
Nowadays kids that are 14 or 15 years old are getting pregnant.
Now that's fucked up.
But i suppose that's just the world we live in, and honestly, it scares me sometimes that drugs and sex and all sorts of illicit and illegal stuff is such an accepted part of day to day life.
But am i complaining? Nah. Just thinking i suppose.
At any rate, i can at least thank God, or whatever higher power you believe in for good music, good friends, and one special girl.
Here's your song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fGRtHd7UdYA
"Juliet, when we made love, you used to cry.
You said, "I love you like the stars above, I'll love you 'til I die".
There's a place for us, you know the movie song.
When you gonna realize it was just that the time was wrong?"
Peace
~Sam
Anyhoo, this got me thinking. I'll be 16 in July, and it was only 6 years ago that i was running around my yard with my buddies, pretending that our sticks were swords and playing with Legos up in my room. 6 years ago.
6 years.
I don't know why this all hit me today...but in 6 years i'll be 21, in about 2 years i'll legally be an adult. Woah.
In 2 years i'll be off at college.
Woah.
Hell, i've still got some old Nerf guns in my closet.
Remember those?
Jesus. I'm growing up.
Woah.
But i'm not complaining! Because this are different now, but not necessarily any worse. True, things are a helluva lot more complicated now, and there are some pretty low Lows. But there's also some pretty high Highs.
"Only a teenage Wasteland"
Moving on, kids are incredibly busy these days. Take my day for example. I was up until 12:30am studying for my Government class, woke up at 6, went to school, came home, got a haircut, went to see my girlfriend, came back home, practiced guitar, ate dinner, went out to the store to buy clothes, and now i'm here. Good day.
However! Back in the '50s all kids needed to worry about was going blind from too much 'happy hands'. Christianity. Morals. Wonderbread. Mayonnaise. Jello. Good stuff like that.
Nowadays kids that are 14 or 15 years old are getting pregnant.
Now that's fucked up.
But i suppose that's just the world we live in, and honestly, it scares me sometimes that drugs and sex and all sorts of illicit and illegal stuff is such an accepted part of day to day life.
But am i complaining? Nah. Just thinking i suppose.
At any rate, i can at least thank God, or whatever higher power you believe in for good music, good friends, and one special girl.
Here's your song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fGRtHd7UdYA
"Juliet, when we made love, you used to cry.
You said, "I love you like the stars above, I'll love you 'til I die".
There's a place for us, you know the movie song.
When you gonna realize it was just that the time was wrong?"
Peace
~Sam
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
The Selfish Post.
The reason this posts is titled as such is that this is honestly me just typing what i'm thinking. Generally i have at least an idea or something that i try to convey, but no. Today is just me typing exactly what i'm thinking. So if you're still reading this, thanks in advance for putting up with this post today.
Lets do this.
Here's the song first. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6FGk_Wxppr8&feature=related
I hope you check that out, cause..that's a great song. And i guess it means something to me.
Alright. So here we go. I hate the fact that i'm pissed for no real reason, and i can't hurt the person that needs to be hurt.
(I'm not editing this post, so don't be too worried...my English teacher calls this a stream of consciousness writing. Basically all the reader can do is enjoy the ride while i vent my little heart out)
Back to my thoughts; I HATE that i can't hurt this person. Because honestly, i would. And i might sound horrible for saying that, but the truth is i would. Without a doubt. And i guarantee if i ever get to the opportunity to, i will.
Why? Why would you say that Sam? (Is what you, the reader, is asking)
Well, because if you f**k with people i care about you'd better believe i'm not going to let you walk away.
But i can't. And i know that i won't. Still, it makes me the slightest bit angry. Most because i feel helpless, and i really, really don't like that feeling.
Next, what's up with guys my age taking advantage/treating girls badly? Hmm? No. Man up. Don't pull that s**t around me, cause once again, i'm not letting you walk away.
Moving on!! Well that's about the end of the violent-Sam-thoughts. 'Cause of course i gotta be mature and realize that people make "mistakes" and that it's wrong to hate a person you've never met with ever fiber of your soul.
Like i said; moving on.
No wait, i lied.
This is the fact of the matter. I don't pretend to be strong, intimidating, or 'badass'. BUT. If you hurt people i care about, you're gonna find yourself facing a whole different Sam.
And that's all...i think.
So. As a re-cap, i think that does it for my pissed off thoughts. I think typing everything above me has been good, and i could delete it all now, but then this whole post would have no point.
Next, you gotta remember that times change, and that life moves on. I'm not going to be a hypocrite and dwell on all this stuff above me, cause like i've said before; Things in the past are there for a reason. You've gotta deal with your stuff and do the best you can to help other's with theirs.
But ooooh boy. If i ever meet that guy. Well. We'll see.
(Joking)
(Or am I?)
Peace.
~Sam
Lets do this.
Here's the song first. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6FGk_Wxppr8&feature=related
I hope you check that out, cause..that's a great song. And i guess it means something to me.
Alright. So here we go. I hate the fact that i'm pissed for no real reason, and i can't hurt the person that needs to be hurt.
(I'm not editing this post, so don't be too worried...my English teacher calls this a stream of consciousness writing. Basically all the reader can do is enjoy the ride while i vent my little heart out)
Back to my thoughts; I HATE that i can't hurt this person. Because honestly, i would. And i might sound horrible for saying that, but the truth is i would. Without a doubt. And i guarantee if i ever get to the opportunity to, i will.
Why? Why would you say that Sam? (Is what you, the reader, is asking)
Well, because if you f**k with people i care about you'd better believe i'm not going to let you walk away.
But i can't. And i know that i won't. Still, it makes me the slightest bit angry. Most because i feel helpless, and i really, really don't like that feeling.
Next, what's up with guys my age taking advantage/treating girls badly? Hmm? No. Man up. Don't pull that s**t around me, cause once again, i'm not letting you walk away.
Moving on!! Well that's about the end of the violent-Sam-thoughts. 'Cause of course i gotta be mature and realize that people make "mistakes" and that it's wrong to hate a person you've never met with ever fiber of your soul.
Like i said; moving on.
No wait, i lied.
This is the fact of the matter. I don't pretend to be strong, intimidating, or 'badass'. BUT. If you hurt people i care about, you're gonna find yourself facing a whole different Sam.
And that's all...i think.
So. As a re-cap, i think that does it for my pissed off thoughts. I think typing everything above me has been good, and i could delete it all now, but then this whole post would have no point.
Next, you gotta remember that times change, and that life moves on. I'm not going to be a hypocrite and dwell on all this stuff above me, cause like i've said before; Things in the past are there for a reason. You've gotta deal with your stuff and do the best you can to help other's with theirs.
But ooooh boy. If i ever meet that guy. Well. We'll see.
(Joking)
(Or am I?)
Peace.
~Sam
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